Ah, how time does fly. Remember when Miley Cyrus and Robin Thicke put on that performance that everyone was totally cool with? The one with the foam finger and the "JESUS H.P. CHRIST WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON???". A year ago. Crazy! Imagine that. So naturally the MTV VMAs have rolled around once again and WORRY NOT, we have everything you need to know riiiiiiiight here.
Firstly the most boring bit: the actual winners. Lorde's 'Royals' won Best Rock Video, beating rock artists Arctic Monkeys, Black Keys, Imagine Dragons and Linkin Park, while Ariana Grande and Iggy Azalea won Best Pop Video for 'Problem'; seeing off Avicii, Iggy Azalea with Charli XCX, Jason Derulo with 2 Chainz and Pharrell Williams. While 'Problem' is a bit of a megatune, isn't the video heinously awkward? (Yes, it is).
Best Female Video was picked up by Katy Perry for 'Dark Horse', Best Male Video was scooped by Ed Sheeran for 'Sing', Drake won Best Hip Hop Video for 'Hold On (We're Going Home)', Fifth Harmony bagged Arist To Watch for 'Miss Movin' On' and Best Lyric Video (does that really need to be a category?) was collected by 5 Seconds Of Summer for 'Don't Stop'.
As for the big'uns, the Michael Jackson Video Vanguard Award was received by Beyonce who, in fairness, did release about 485 music videos with her latest album, and Miley Cyrus won the all-important Video Of The Year for 'Wrecking Ball'; which did of course hold the VEVO 24 hour record until just last week when Nicki Minaj's ass-tastic 'Anaconda' stole it.
As for the performances - best of luck finding them on YouTube after the ruddy Fun Police decided they can't be uploaded, but apparently Nicki Minaj had a wardrobe malfunction when performing with Jessie J and Ariana Grande, and Taylor Swift did a solid job of delivering the first televised rendition of her freakin' brilliant new single 'Shake It Off''. Actually that one you can watch (below) until someone inevitably rips it down. The bastards. Look out for the bit where she goes into a big skit about not doing a big jump and running around the set instead. When the music restarts and she launches into the money note, she juuuust misses it. Fabulous.
The amount of fucks Ariana Grande gave there was precisely zero.
In annual #VMADramz, people reckon Miley Cyrus called Ed Sheeran an asshole after he won his award, and - because Miley let a homeless man collect her gong for her - Gossip Cop have successfully put two and two together and deduced that she must have known about the victory ahead of the ceremony.
What a time to be alive. Lots of pictures above.
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